What is a Modern Husband?
There is no single image of a Modern Husband. We cannot be explained by what we look like, described by what we do, or by the gender of our spouse or partner. Diversity is representative of who we are and an expectation of our community.
We see marriage and partnership as interchangeable concepts that define our commitment to one another. Our society is transitioning from "traditional marriages" to include commitments free of judgmental labels.
We are devoted husbands married to working spouses. We help manage the family finances and the home. We like to laugh. We celebrate the career successes of our spouses and support what they need if uncommon stresses accompany their jobs.
A couple of decades ago, dual-income households became the norm, a trend that continues to grow.
Our commitment to our partners and what's needed to work together to manage our homes is how we are measured as men. Most modern husbands work, many of us flip back and forth with our spouses as the breadwinner, and others are primary caregivers in our families.
We are not the exception anymore; we are the norm.
We are not less when we earn less than our spouse, nor are we more when we earn more than our spouse.
What is our why?
Men and society unevenly embrace the changing role of husbands in households. Many men grapple with a household role that looks very different from their grandfather's.
According to Of Boys and Men, occupations more susceptible to automation are more likely to employ men. Meanwhile, we have seen an evolution in the labor force for women. Women are now the breadwinners in 38% of households. There are concerted efforts to advance women in high-paying career fields. We celebrate these efforts while also celebrating our partners.
The expectation of men in the home has not kept pace with women's progress in the workforce.
Again, according to this survey shared in Of Boys and Men: "For a man to be a good husband or partner, being able to financially support a family is very important.
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81% with a H.S. education or less agreed with this statement
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62% with a bachelor's degree agreed with this statement"
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According to PEW, the majority of women agreed with this sentiment. Perhaps this explains why, on average, men are psychologically distressed when their wives make the same as them or more.
Many men are hurting. According to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, men end their own lives at nearly 4x the rate as women.
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Our "Why" is to support men working through our new normal and help men support spouses in their career ambitions. We make intentional efforts on various social media platforms to help men laugh, celebrate the successes of men, and share ideas to manage money and the home with our spouses.
We welcome you to the Modern Husbands community.
