Married? How to Crush 3 Common Goals Together

Most surveys find that roughly half of Americans set some New Year’s resolutions. It’s a thing. Type it into Google, and you’ll find 276,000,000+ suggestions. 

Did you make a New Year's Resolution? According to surveys, only 9% of Americans who make resolutions complete them, and 23% quit by the end of the first week.

If you did set a New Year’s Resolution, chances are it is to:

• Save more money

• Be happy

• Exercise more

We are well past January 1st, but that shouldn't stop you from restarting with the steps you need to keep the promise you made to yourself. If you’re married, we will share how you can still achieve these goals or any New Year’s Resolutions you and your spouse have established together. 

Save More Money: Establish Systems for Financial Success

We are creatures of habit, and habits are formed mainly from what is easiest to do now. Whether you and your spouse want to save more money, pay down debt, or spend less, you need to put systems in place that make good choices easier and bad choices harder. 

Take, for instance, saving more money. 

Start by making the time to establish a new checking or savings account at a financial institution different from where you do your primary banking. Online banks, credit unions, or community banks often have high-yield options. 

If you and your spouse use your savings and checking accounts from the same bank, what often happens is that people treat the accounts as two checking accounts, moving money back and forth between them. When the savings is out of sight, it is out of mind. 

Ask your employer for the paperwork needed to establish a second paycheck deposit. Split a portion of your paycheck into your new savings account. You’ve now automated saving, making it harder to spend and easier to save. 

Deciding how much to save and how to approach the conversation with your spouse is equally important. For ideas to help you be successful, read 5 Tips for How to Save Money: For Couples. 

Be Happy: Meet Routinely with Your Spouse

Countless studies highlight the importance of meeting with your partner regularly to manage money and the home as a team. Weekly meetings provide a structured platform to discuss concerns, joys, and aspirations, fostering a deeper understanding of each other's perspectives.

Conversation Topic: Supporting One Another

In a past episode of the Modern Husbands Podcast, we discussed the keys to a successful transition into marriage in the first six months. Podcast co-host Dr. Bruce Ross, who is engaged, shared that he and his partner ask each other the following five questions each week: 

• What brought you joy or excitement this past week?

• Is there anything I have done to hurt you this past week that we can repair now?

• What are you looking forward to in the upcoming week?

• What’s something worrisome/hard that’s happening in the upcoming week(s)? Is there something I can do to help?

• What can I do next week to make you feel more loved?
  

Conversation Topic: Managing Money

Money is regularly cited as a leading cause of divorce and stress in a marriage. An abundance of research points to couples who openly discuss finances being happier and experiencing lower stress levels. 

Weekly meetings dedicated to discussing finances allow for transparency, joint decision-making, and the establishment of common financial goals, thereby promoting financial harmony and security within the marriage. Subscribe to the Modern Husbands Newsletter for ideas to manage money as a couple delivered to your inbox every couple of weeks. 

Conversation Topic: Managing the Home

Research indicates that equitable distribution of household chores is associated with marital satisfaction. Weekly meetings offer an opportunity to openly discuss chore allocation, preferences, and any adjustments needed, ensuring a fair and shared responsibility, reducing resentment, and fostering a sense of teamwork. It is essential that couples fairly distribute the cognitive load, often unfairly shouldered by women in many relationships.

Exercise More

Exercising together as a married couple isn't just about breaking a sweat; it's about fostering a stronger, healthier relationship. Sharing physical activities can breathe new life into your bond and bring about numerous benefits beyond just fitness. 

Research suggests that couples who exercise together report higher levels of motivation and accountability, leading to better adherence to fitness routines. And it is no secret that engaging in physical activities fosters a deeper emotional bond due to the release of endorphins, often referred to as "feel-good" hormones, leading to increased feelings of closeness and happiness. 

Better Together

Whether you want to save more, be happier, or be healthier, what is clear is that you’re more likely to reach your goals if you work toward them together, with your spouse.